lackluster epitome, you waste my time, are you kiddin me? you make me lazy, dull, wish i didn't know you. get out of my life, or jump right in, it's as if you've got no clue. you mean a lot to me, i wish the feelings mutual, i make it like you in my life is real crutial. in your mind you and i are like the bank, theres no more washington mutual. you kinda got a lot of cargo, no wonder i bank at wells fargo. i really enjoy you around, but if we'll never be anything, all i can do is frown. on the ground. like ground beef, thats what my heart feels like, ground meat. mashed up in small peices, but you don't even want me to prove my thesis. we're like a bad essay, me and you lack context, supporting facts, we'll never get an A.

catch up!
haven't blogged in a while. last week was real busy. trying to go out, school, and work. i studied til past 2 am three times last week! late night study sesh's at sdsu w/ j lam. and jeannie. i killed myself one night, drank up southside, slept at porks at 3 am. woke up for work at 6 am. then worked 7 - 4. then had to study after! it's really wearing me out... so i been chillin lately. monday, another late night with history exam prep. i had my exam tues. we were all stressin about it! but i think we'll all do alright. study study study, exams exams exams. damnit.

i kinda care about you, even after what we went through. i feel bad, if you were doin bad. why? how do i even kno how you're doin? guess i kinda know cuz i had to snoop. lol and if your reading this blog entry, you're a snooper too. so i guess what i'm sayin is, if you were down to talk. hit me up, let's do lunch.

i do things so unnecessarily. why do i care so much, would you do the same for me? NAW, rarely. goes to show how much effort i'm putting in, lack of anything there, waiting for you to jump in. i jumped off, fell down. waiting for you to meet me there, i dont see you and i just frown. look at me, layin on the ground. with a frown, drinkin crown. siiike, but really lookin like a clown. you can only do so much, with out taking chances of gettin rejected. why is rejection such a big thing, its better than havin your heart neglected. keepin feelings inside, when they're meant to tell the world. keep your bullshit inside, theres no room for it in this world. you, her, and her: i'm you guys plan B. i bring my A game, but sit on bench constantly. don't get me wrong, sure i can get play. but no play i want, they're just fun and games. so i don't take advantage, cuz i want you. so for right now my hearts got a bandage, from lack of you too. i guess i'm waiting for you to holler at me boo. im sittin here with my un-laced shoes. trying to run shit, i need you to tie them, so we can shit.

go listen to: colby o donis - thinking bout ya
i heard this song a couple months ago, and was like damn did this guy just take all my thoughts and put it in his song? that biter. just kidding.

hey girl. you're getting hotter. hotter than the average temperature that a man could stand if you hold my hand, i could be your man. but i, didn't kno you'd make this harder. whatchu tryna say baby... running games on me.

girl i will try, to give the best to you, and do the things others wouldn't do. cause your expectations got so high, i could be your guy only if i tried, but i kno i gotta step my game up.

girl i been thinkin bout ya.
girl i been dreamin bout ya..

...cause the scent of your clothes, the red blush on your face, even your swagger makes me wish that i could grab a taste. cause you don't know, all the hoops i had to go through to get you a second in my life...

...don't be distant, don't be shy...

..girl i'll break my back, to cover all your needs, as long as you is pleased, it don't matter to me...

anyways, it's been raining non stop. that makes me wanna sleep, plus i only got 3 hours of sleep this morning before i had to go to work. deco's was fun tho. i have a lot of hw to catch up on tonight, so i better sleep now. class tomorrow morning =(

i've got problems in the morning. no matter what i'm doing, i'm LATE. since i've worked at vons, i've been 10 minutes late for work, daily. it's weird cause i'm exactly 10 mintues late. why can't i be exactly on time?? i try really hard, and i just can't do it. same goes for school... so i just skipped econ all together. my teacher is crazy, she teaches at mesa and sdsu, and i don't know what her deal is, but she misses class every other class. but never tells us anything! so i figure, why not skip it. i went and got a haircut. i've been cutting my hair and it's gettin fucked up. so i paid 14 dollars + tip for the lady who is a professional to do exactly what me or a homie could have done to my hair. then i had a quiz in humanities today, i'm pretty sure i failed. it's ok though, i have time to get my A in there. after school, had a quick photoshoot with adda hahaha. her sk takes pretty good pics.

i'm so lazy after school, school gets me extra tired. so i have to nap. i missed one of my homegirls bday kickbacks. i was about to head up to temecula tonight, i haven't been up there in a long time. i skipped that. and i'm home, and need to wake up for work at 7 am. well i might be up in temecula tomorrow, hit me up! i have no idea what i'm doing on valentines day haha. i could do a last minute bs date, but i don't know if i want to do that. any cuties wanna hit me up?? ;) sunday deco's for og jeannies bday. hit me up with first and last names for guest list!!

i found a new love for silly string. i sprayed "hater" really bad. i felt bad! hahaha sorry adda. and i sprayed some random cuties ;) i even sprayed this one girl that doesn't talk to me anymore, alex. WHATS UP if you're reading this!

kind of a crazy story. get this, i was trippin out. i added this girl on myspace yesterday. just cause i thought i knew her, or i've seen her around. then today, i saw this cute girl leaving school, i just thought she was a random cute girl. and i sprayed her car with silly string when we were at a stop sign! then saw her at a stop light, and i tried to talk to her for a second, said hi, then the light turned. but the girl in the car was the girl i added on myspace previously before all this happened today! so i got a comment on myspace saying hey you sprayed my car with silly string! and i was like whaaaat. what a small world huh? i hope she doesn't think i'm too much of a goof ball LOL.

well school is still sucky, i think i'm in for a shity awakening though. i've been slackin... and test quizes and exams are right around the corner. i need to buckle down.

study sesh? let's set um. i know i know, we don't have the same classes right? but the fact you meet up to study, you're probably more likely to study! so hit me up!

"HATER" sprayed, in her stank ass car. jk maaayne

imagine this, you wake up at 6 am for work. you're tired, lazy, and just want to get back to bed. plus it's raining harder than it does in movies. you force yourself to get to work... 30 minutes late. then after attempting to work for an hour, you sneak away to your car. its pouring rain outside. so hard, that you almost got in an accident on your way to work. you get in your car, while you're still on the clock getting paid, tired... not wanting to be at work at all. jump in the drivers seat, wet all over, wet socks, kind of have to pee. recline the seat back. its cold, but you have two hoodies on. you hear the hard rain hitting your car, you turn your radio on and play your slow jam cd... with the volume low enough so you can still hear the rain. looking up threw the moonroof, watching each drop splash as it hits the glass. you close your eyes, and fall asleep.

then girl, you can imagine you were on my mind right before i dozed off. you probably were ;)

work of art flow!
we were a work of art, i used a sharpie. you used a pencil, and drew all sloppy. after it was done, you got an eraser, erased all the pencil and left me thinkin should i chase her? i chased after you, before our art was finished, and i don't know why i chased you after our art diminished. all this for no reason, i really trusted you, but all your acts of treason; or were you just teasin. you just wanted some pleasin. you told me im cool, fly, and super steezin. so much wasted effort on you, like so many other people in my life, you'd think i'd get the clue. i'm better than you, but i dont need to hear it. cause deep down i know and you're gonna hear it. "you're a dumbass" "you're a bitch" "you're wasting time on shit that ain't legit". you think you look for the good in people, you see the good, hate on it cause you don't get to see people. get out of your bubble, you're going no where. you've got such big plans to end up somewhere.

it bugs me when girls act beyond their age, unless they back it up, life is such a bigger stage. you get up there, and use big words. but honestly, can you define those words? word. see, you pulled out a dictionary. you sing like a scrub but think you sould like mariah carey. i can say you're letting your self go. you have no physical acivity except walkin to the store for some ho ho's. and on your way there, people callin you a ho ho. well i need to go, good luck fosho HO.
<3 brandon. jk

HAHA i have no idea why i felt like i had to write that. i'm not even in a bummed out mood, just had some weird thoughts about past memories and future situations. i guess it's just inspiration. lol jk. you probably have an idea who its about, it isn't about her tho. or her. but i think it's about her. it's kind of a random words put together, based on those past and future memories and situations.

so many girls to write about, is this about you? maybe, maybe not, maybe two of you. ya right! i'm no player, but lately gettin played.. like i'm just fun and games. from day 1, i thought you were cute, fly and what not. believe it or not you were hotter than the sneakers i just bought. if you were my size, i'd wear you on the daily. lace my shoes tight, run shit like you do daily. you do more than run shit, you're running through my mind. how i'd love to be up on you and feelin them theighs. siiiiiiike. thats not what i'm about, i'm not like every other guy, calm down don't shout. those phonies... honeslty i just want to spend time, kickit, not tryna get domies. chill like homies. well i'll take it from there, then maybe give it a shot. see if you were really hotter than the sneakers i bought. i don't see you too often, but still give me and you a thought =) haha actually maybe i'm just crushin. i'll give it time no need for rushin.

well i'm glad this week is over, i've had 0 days off from school and work. next week i'll have more time off thank god. i only got out of the house twice this week, and i had to be home early cause of school or work the next day. i can tell when i'm spending more time at home:

1 - i have a lot more pocket money cause i'm not out spending money.
2 - i find myself having longer conversations on aim, talking on oovoo, and replying to comments and messeges on myspace real quick cause im HOME! haha

i been slangin textbooks this week too. all the people that picked up books were dope!. lot of um were cuties, and down to kickit. weird huh? reminds me one time i bought something off craigslist, and met up with the girl with some friends and the girl was cute! and she was trying to hang out with me. weird... school sucks, except for socializing. second week of school this week =( so far away from the end of the semester. saw a face i didn't think i would have, i just said "how ya doin?" lol geez.. why am i so nice? i have no reason to be. oh well. heroes starts tomorrow. lol ya i'm a nerd bout that. oh and some nigga hit my car today in the parking lot, nothing major.. but still.